Author: Melissa

I’ve started a ton of blog posts lately and they’ve all been relegated to the draft bin. I may finish them some day but I hope I never do. They’re depressing, maudlin pieces of garbage with no redeeming qualities whatsoever. They’re self-indulgent to the extreme. I feel so guilty and it’s all my fault and WAHHHHHHH! Someone slap me would you?

I really hate when I get into these moods. I gradually lose my ability to let negativity bounce off me and I have realized recently that, somewhere along the line, I started sucking it up and absorbing it and making it mine. And? I DO NOT WANT.

There are a couple ways to handle this, my normal withdrawal and hunker down until the mood passes or I can fight back. People who are having a bad day don’t want to hear that they’re dragging the hive mind down, they’ll just think I’m being an insenstive birch ((And, they’d be right!)). So, what to do?

If you haven’t made the connection yet, I’m one of the co-founders of that LINKS group over there on the left, the Fragile X LINKS Group of Eastern Massachusetts. What I’m going to do is plan a series of events to get my Fragile X peeps together…our first is a night out for parents and it is on March 5th. That is a full month away. Take a few hours off, you deserve them. Find a neighbor or friend or family member to sit with the kid(s).

If you’re in the area and have not already signed up for the mailing list, you should because I’ve got big plans for that group. The draft blog posts over there are much more fun than the ones here!

For a very long time, Monkey would greet me at the end of a long hard day with tears. He had held himself together all day at school and all afternoon at home and my appearance was simply the permission he needed to fall apart. Money was home! Everyone was safe! Let’s have a good long cry!

This pattern was really hard to break because, over time, I was conditioned to expect tears ((And sometimes puke, joy.)) when I walked through the front door which made me a little tense. Monkey fed off my stress and a vicious cycle was born.

We tried a variety of methods but what seemed to work best is that, well, Monkey decided he preferred to greet me in another way. Sorry that I don’t have any stellar parenting tips to help you out but, then again, I never do so…no harm done, I guess.

SO, this new greeting? I love it and it shows that my Monkey pays very close attention to his Money. When I open the front door now, before I make my way up the stairs, I’ll hear Monkey yell out, “Money’s home! Hi Money!” Sometimes he’ll run to see me and sometimes he’ll wait for me to come to him but as soon as we make eye contact he’ll whisper, sweetly, “Choc-o-late?”

Yes, please! That is the exact best way to welcome me home.

Last year he refused outright to pick out any birthday party gear. If you want to look ridiculous, and really, who doesn’t, you should try chasing your five year old around a party store demanding that they pick a theme right. now. THEN threaten them with, “We are not leaving until you pick birthday plates, dammit!” OK, I didn’t really…well, I did *blush* but I did NOT say “dammit!” ((The answer to that question that just flitted through your brain is “Lots.” There is LOTS wrong with me.))

I thought that this year I might get us back on track by slowly breaking him down introducing the subject to him. Since his birthday is in May I thought January would be soon enough but I think he just made it clear that I should have started in January 2009, which was the last time we discussed it and he didn’t immediately shoot down the very idea of a party.

I just very casually showed him some plates I thought he might enjoy (here, here and here) and a set I want (here) and he immediately responded with “No, stay here?” and ran out of the room. I haven’t even mentioned the “P” word yet! This should be fun.

Come ON! Who says no to plates like this???

Monkey has been asking to “watch TV” today. He will sometimes ask to watch something but it’s pretty rare and, when he does, he requests the show by the character which makes finding what he wants a lot easier. Today, however, he’s only been saying “A” when we ask what he wants to watch on TV. Not terribly helpful.

Duhdee finally turned on the TV and brought up the list of recorded shows so Monkey could point to what it was he wanted to watch. As soon as the list popped up Duhdee started to scroll down through the list but Monkey said “No! No! Up!” Duhdee scrolled back up and Monkey found just what it was he wanted to watch…Ask This Old House ((Monkey and Duhdee like to watch a number of home repair shows, Duhdee is always looking to learn or find new ideas and Monkey likes the tools. Win-win!)). “A” it is then!

I just bought my little Monkey a new shirt.

How awesome is that?

**You have to open the post fully to see the picture, I’m not just overly excited about any old shirt or my (already well documented) ability to buy one 🙂

I left my darling little boy in the hands of his Duhdee and I came back to hear this story…

Duhdee: “So, on Friday, after he took his shower he watched me take my allergy meds and put on deodorant…”

Umma, thinking “Okayyy?”

Duhdee: “Then he told me ‘My turn.’

Umma: …

Duhdee: “He wanted to wear my deodorant.”

Umma, laughing because that is just ridiculous, right?? RIGHT????

Yeah, I’m not laughing now. Especially since Monkey wants people to sniff his pitts to smell his deodorant! 😮

No one is more amazed about either of those things than I. There was a 1/2 hour, standing at security at the YYC ((Look at me, the seasoned Calgary traveler after one trip, snort.)), when I thought I might not make it home. I thought I was going to have an absolute stroke when one (out of ten) of the security guards decided that a souvenir that I’d bought for my 6 year old was too dangerous to be allowed on the plane. Because that’s something I do, give deadly objects to my child. Whatever. I checked the bag instead and everyone was happy. Except for the security guard who got sent on break so his supervisor could talk to him about how he handled the situation. Srsly. The other guards were joking around with me trying to smooth over the ridiculousness of the situation.

Anyway. I’m home and I have the very best memories ever to cherish. And I might even be allowed back into Canada some day! Woot!

While I was gone I was keeping up with Facebook and sharing some of the amazing times we were having. Part of me didn’t want to share because I didn’t want to make anyone feel badly for not being included but most of me wanted to share every detail and make you all absolutely sick with envy. Not because I’m an a$$hole ((Though I am that too!)) but because I wanted you all to get get excited enough to take a trip of your own.

Those of you who were looking on and thinking I WANT THAT! Do it! I’m sure there is someone you have interacted with on the listserve, through Facebook or through another blog that you feel an affinity with. Maybe they’re local to you, maybe they’re not. Just remember, this all started with ONE mom saying she wanted to get some FX Mommies together. There are a lot of “impossible” things we face in life, a weekend away is not one of them!