Non Sequitur

It’s a new week but it looks awfully familiar.

Melissa

What is the perfect topper to a depressed Umma? How about an incapacitated Duhdee?

Duhdee’s been having back issues since last fall, they assumed a ruptured disk that was irritating his sciatic nerve. It should have resolved within 4-6 months. He went through PT and did OK but never great. Over the last two weeks it has simply gone to hell. He had an MRI last weekend because he was in increasing pain, by Wednesday he could barely get out of bed. On Saturday, he didn’t.

An orthopedic surgeon finally reviewed his MRI results on Saturday after having been hounded by the on call nurse…he does have a ruptured disk but it’s not irritating his sciatic nerve. It is pinching the nerve and has partially dislodged it. The only fix…surgery.

Life is going to be very interesting around here for the near future…

Moving along quickly.

Melissa

Leaving that post up here makes me feel like I left my underwear ((Clean!)) out when guests came over. Not like if Great Grampy saw them ((Utterly mortifying! Sort of like the time Monkey showed Grampy a video on YouTube. It was a Pixar spoof called D.ixar. Fortunately, his eyesight is not what it once was so he could not identify the, uh, object hopping across the screen.)), more like if one of you all saw them ((Mildly embarrassing. Sort of like the time I wrote about my underwear on the internet.)). Right, so, changing subjects quickly because, seriously, I have no excuse to be discussing my underwear on the internet. AND! Where on earth does this come from? I’m sure there are other much more appropriate analogies but noooo, my mind goes straight to my unmentionables. My head is screaming abort, abort, abort and my fingers…they march cheerily on. My apologies.

So, moving that post off the main page…that is a good goal and setting achievable goals is a sure fire way for me to feel better. It’s therapy. Talking about my underwear as therapy, interesting. Gah, moving on NOW!

What on earth is an appropriate topic after all that? Probably one I should avoid since both my mother and my father read this and they’re probably writing me out of the will and canceling our summer reservations at their camp this very moment.

Perhaps I should just set a goal of doing better tomorrow? I mean, really, that shouldn’t be too hard.

Unshareable thoughts shared.

Melissa

I’m moody and snappy and irritated beyond all reasonable limits given the relatively happy situation ’round these parts. My thoughts are tilting noticeably to the blackhearted and ugly and I hate that. It’s not who I am.

It’s weird at times to sit here and type away, sharing so much of myself and my family and not really knowing who is reading it. Most days I don’t think about it. Then again, most days I’m sharing safe thoughts and feelings. Not all of my thoughts and feelings are safe though, some of them scare me.

That whole IEP thing, for example. Sure, it was mildly annoying but I didn’t react like it was an annoyance. I reacted like it was a threat or an attack of some sort. I stewed and fumed about it all weekend. I woke up in the middle of the night thinking about it, getting angry about it again and again. I thought up lots of vicious and cutting things to say to this woman ((Who I have never met.)) who obviously had evil intentions.

Does that sound crazy to you? Yeah, it does to me too. I don’t like the person who thinks those things, who feels that way.

What is at the root of all this? I don’t feel better. It’s been a month since I restarted my Welbutrin and I do not feel better. I should. I want to, oh my god, do I want to. I’m tired of being tired and snappy and having to work so hard to keep focused on the positives.

I’m trying to convince myself that my awareness of my unreasonable moods is evidence that I am getting better. I am just not all the way there yet. But I’m really and truly scared right now that this time it won’t work and that I’m going to feel exhausted and overwhelmed and depressed forever. I’m not supposed to feel this way anymore! I’m supposed to at least be able to feel the freaking breeze on my cheeks.

I know this isn’t rational. I know that I will feel better someday. Maybe tomorrow or maybe the day after that, something will give me the boost I need to get back on the positive side. But there is always that little voice in the deepest part of my brain though that whispers that maybe this time is different. Maybe I won’t ever feel better.

It’s the most hopeless feeling in the world when that voice is louder than anything else.

*Cough*hack*Cough*

Melissa

Monkey’s fever has broken but that cough, ugh. Because of the medications he’s on he cannot take cough suppressants either. I just went into his room to set up the Vicks Waterless Vaporizer ((No, I am not getting any compensation for that little bit of free advertising.)) and his little face just lit up. I hope it lives up to his high expectations and he gets some rest tonight. Poor kid looks exhausted.

Speaking of coughing…nope, I got nothing else to say on the topic since the fact that it sucks obviously goes without saying, right?

<Insert smooth segue here ((Fail.))>

It appears that we are planning a fund-raising walk to raise money for the NFXF and for our LINKS group so we can sponsor some fun family outings to give our families the much needed time around others who get it. I’m petrified that we’ll do all this planning and then no one will come! What can I do to get you to come? I’ll beg and I’m not above shedding some tears if that’s what it will take…just watch me sob as the actual day approaches ((Probably in August but my event planner SAMANTHA, has not gotten back to me on the location availability.)).

So, seriously, what would it take to get you to come out and join a walk besides getting to meet the incredibly hip and fun organizer? 😉

Not so sweet…

Melissa

I came home this evening to a sick little Monkey. Poor kiddo asked to go to bed an hour early! That is never a good sign.

It’s not often I share pictures here because I want to try to protect Monkey’s online identity as much as possible. The last thing the kid needs is his friends Googling him and reading all about his potty habits, you know? Anyway, I figured this one was safe enough ((Duhdee gets no such special treatment!)).

He had wrapped himself tightly in his Toy Story blanket and he was using it like a body sock. Uh…when you search Google Images for that, you might want to add “sensory” after that term … and don’t skim too far down the page. You know, on second thought…just don’t search Google Images. Try this instead.














This is sort of, in a very tiny way, FX related.

Melissa

I’ve admitted to being a geek before. I like gadgets, not as much as my husband, but I like them. A lot.

Last fall I whined and moaned about giving up my Blackberry. I loved it and it was pretty ((Red!)) and then…I got an iPhone. To say that I love my iPhone would be an understatement of epic proportions. Anyone who has seen me since I got it has seen it because it is most often in my hand. I’m a compulsive email and Facebook checker. I carry a charger with me everywhere because I regularly drain the battery. I Skype on it, I blog on it, I text, I read library books ((Seriously! It is pretty dang cool that I can check out books from my library network on my phone in less than a minute and THEY RETURN THEMSELVES! No more late fines!))…I do pretty much everything except use it as a phone, hmmm, funny that.

Anyway.

Now that I’ve enjoyed my iPhone…I have this irresistible urge for an iPad *sigh* Why do I need an iPad? I don’t! I need an iPadTWOOOOOOO! Have you seen the new covers?? I’m having trouble though. Duhdee did mention yesterday buying me an iPad and I asked him, “Why would you want to buy me an iPad when there is an iPadTWOOOOOOO?” and he responded, “I don’t want to buy you an iANYTHING!”

He is sooooo hung up on this Android thing. And fine, maybe open source is better, maybe expandability is better, maybe cheaper ((Slightly.)) is better but but but…

 

 

Why can’t Android be PRETTY? Is that really too much to ask for??

Can you guess which cover I want?

To make this sort of, in a very tiny way, FX related…there are a lot of Apps for communication and learning on the iPad 😉 ((Hey, I warned you in the title!)).

 

By Request

Melissa

I like to give my readers what they’re looking for so I just sorted through the search terms people have used to get here…may I present, The Answers You Have Been Looking For…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Sunbeam doesn’t come with wings that I can find. Are you sure it wasn’t Starflight?)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’m sorry, do any of you actually want to be here??

Totally Random

Duhdee

This is Duhdee signing on to check to see if Umma’s fancy facebook plugin is working so her posts will be shared automatically again. I figured since she called me out on facebook this morning, I can post this here on her blog.